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The CP3-Port-Toas
''You wanna hear something funny? You're dead. -Portable Toaster to a deceased Scout. The CP3-Port-Toas is a sniper that has abilities of a toaster. These beings look like they are natural, but in fact, they are artificial robots. The chief of the Port-Toases goes by the name of Portable Toaster. We have asked him about his species, and this is what he has told us. "blergh, I dont feel so 'BLURGHBLUUUUUUURGGGHHH GAAAHH'. urgh." He was drunk at the time, but we got this information. The Standard CP3-Port-ToasCategory:Sniper TF2-nimals These creatures are generally peaceful beings, but will attack if provoked. The Port-Toases can be in RED or BLU. These toaster like creatures wear an Anger hat (painted depending on their personality) and some times the Professer' s Speks. If threatened, they will attack with either a huntsman, a sniper or jarate. They cannot take water well, and will self destruct when contact. These beings feed off bread and produce toast, like a normal toaster. They respect the Airforce Family and it is rumored that the chief, Portable Toaster is one of them. However, they still will attack if provoked, just like if the Airforce member was a normal human. They do have a good understanding of english, and will communicate with humans. The Advanced CP3-Port-Toas ''I see you, ya wanker. -An Advanced CP3-Port-Toas to a far away Fyroman. A massive upgrade to the standard CP3-Port-Toas, the advanced Port-Toas is more sophisticated than their counterparts. They can be distinguished by their Extra Layer that the normal ones do not have. When Portable Toaster, the chief, isn't around, these are in charge of the others, even though they don't really have a true leader without Portable Toaster. The advanced Port-Toas is slightly more better with defence and will not hesitate to attack if threatened. These beings can't take water well, but makes more toast than the standard Port-Toas. This is a rare creature, so attacking is prohibited. The Aquatic CP3-Port-Toas Unlike the other CP3 races, this animal improves upon contact with water. Upon contact, their senses improve greatly and their toast becomes waterproof. If threatened, they will shoot the attacker down. This creature is rare, more rarer than the normal ones. These creatures wear a Criminal's Cloak along with the other items. These beings are quite shy when it comes into new creatures. However, they will hunt enemies down. These creatures use a Cleaners Carbine instead of jarate, as jarate doesntt work under water. We need more info, so if you find any more attributes, please dont hesitate to add to this page. The Chrono-CP3-Port-Toas The Chrono-Port-Toas is a subrace that is slightly more common than the standard CP3-Port-Toas. The Chrono-Port-Toas has a Chronomancer which distinguishes them from the others. They are toasters that are slightly more aggressive towards offenders and can use the Classic, the Normal Sniper or the Huntsman/Fortified Compound. If you anger one of these, it is advised to run as fighting one of these can result in permanent loss of life. They can take water better than the Standard CP3, but still will die in it. Some people dress up as these for parades, and they celebrate them. Portable Toaster This being is the chief of the Port-Toases, and is respected greatly. He is usually seen in RED. Unlike the standard Port-Toases, he wears a Dread Riding Hood, along with the Extra Layer and Professer specs. Sometimes, he may resemble an undead human individual, removing the specs. In additonn to having the abilities of the standard CP3-Port-Toas, he is immune to water, his toast-making ability is improved, and he will use a MK.II botkiller sniper, or a huntsman. It has been stated that Portable Toaster is in fact, an Airforce family member. He is the only one of his sub-race, but we dontt know if the Port-Toases are able to choose a new chief if Portable dies or not. Portable Toaster attacks slightly better than his normal counter-parts, and is capable of human english. Approaching him is fine, just dontt attempt to murder him or you may get kicked off the server. He doesn't take slavery very well, with a history of enslavment. He has a slight addiction to bread. Being an Airforce, he can rocket jump, albeit poorly since he is a sniper. However, he may transform into a soldier/trolldier, and thats when his skills improve. If you see him, do not attempt to hunt him as he is ENDANGERED! We are trying to clone him, but we need more research. The Meta-Port-Toas The Meta-Port-Toas isn't a sniper, but instead, is a trolldier. This is Portable's airforce state. He wears an orange Whirly Warrior, a samurai mask (I cantt remember what its called) and Jupiter Jumpers. He sometimes uses this to duel with the Airforce, although this is purely for fun and training. How Portable does this is a mystery even to him, but it probably originates from his Airforce blood. The BLU Portable Toaster ''Holy dooly! -Portable Toaster upon realising his BLU counterpart. There is a rare and odd chance that you may see a BLU version of Portable Toaster, and it may or may not be him. A sub-race of Portable Toaster exists where he appears blue, and there is ONE known of this sub-race. His name is Tortable Poaster, and he is Portable's long lost brother. Sometimes, theres a hate between the two, as of all human brothers, but other than that, they get along pretty well. Tortable has the same attributes as Portable, minus the addiction to bread and tortured past. Powers and Weaknesses. Powers *Toast-making. *Sniping. *Radar scan. *Advanced melee attacking. *Diplomancy. *English. *Jarate throwing. Weakness *Water. *Fyroman hate. *Can't tolerate slavery (Portable only) *Addiction to bread. (Portable only) *Death of other CP3s (morale decrease) Endangered Species The numbers of CP3-Port-Toases have been decreasing as a result of toaster abuse, hunting, Fyromen, and other reasons. As of this, the CP3-Port-Toas is an endangered tf2nimal, and hunting will result in permanent loss of life. The CP3s are recovering and at this rate, there may be hope for the creatures. How to become. A normal CP3-Port-Toas - The Anger Hat (any paint) The Professer Speks (optional) The Extra Layer (Advanced only) The Chronomancer (Chrono only) The Criminals Cloak (Aquatic only) Portable Toaster (note that if he finds anyone like this, he will either get excited or kill you) - The Dread Riding Hood, The Extra Layer, The professer speks. The Rivalry between The CP3 and the Fyroman ''Ah piss. -A CP3-Port-Toas about to be defeated by a Fyroman. Since the dawn of time, the Fyromen and the CP3-Port-Toases have been fighting. It all started with a simple prank the Fyromen did that backfired, a pie to the face was off, blew up, and the CP3-Port-Toas took it the wrong way. CP3-Port-Toases will go out of their way to slay them, and the feeling is mutal. Portable fears that since their numbers are low, this might be extinction. Fortunatley, there is a solution. If Portable ever finds the Holy Toaster Launcher(an even better version of the Toaster Launcher), he can use it to win the war. He will need help, so if you can, do attempt to aid him in this quest. How the CP3-Port-Toas dropped in numbers. Just as the Airforce suffered from Frok and Holty, research has shown that the same two men were involved in endangering the CP3-Port-Toas. Similar to the "Airacaust", Frok had declared the CP3s unintelligent "piss throwing bread warmers" and the mercs set out to hunt them. Portable had survived the onslaught barely, but he mourns for his brethren. It was a sunny day in ctf_2fort, and the Port-Toases were thriving. A van pulled up, and men got out, after that, things got messy. This was the day Portable had started his annual march, and he was present. Upon hiding in a barrel, he noticed someone approaching him. The man was not here to end his life, but to help. His name was Peanuts, and he handed a strange Cow Mangler. Portable started laying down fire on the mercs, and thats when he realised how special the rocket launcher was. Etched on it was "Toaster Launcher" and it fired many energy pellets at once. He made the mercs retreat, but it was a bit too late. The damage had been done, and many of his people were dead. An entire sub-species had beed wiped out, and to this day, Portable swears revenge on Frok and Holty. Fortunately for Portable, he wasnt alone. His other family, the Airforce, had suffered greatly as well. To this day, Portable is hunting the two men with Airforce Grandpa, to honour his fallen comrades. With the war between the Fyromen, this isnt going to be easy. The event has been dubbed, "The Toastericaonate". Allies and enemies. Allies *The Airforce Species. Natural allies of these solly birds, and there is related blood between the two. *Spycrabs. Natural allies. *Some humans. Some humans are respected in the Port-Toas community. * Breadgineers. These engineers give the CP3-Port-Toast all the bread they need. * Other CP3-Port-Toases. They have a better bond than most tf2nimals have. * Lazygineers. Free beer nuff said. * The Winter Shogunate. The leader managed to befriend the toasters, and also the leader is an Airforce. * Pyrosharks. Portable met Scoots and Biolizard, and they seemed alright. Enemies *Sewer Medics. Although not really a primary source of food, CP3s have hated them because they are loud and too territorial. *Some humans. I'm talking about the ones who kill everything they see. *Sniperdiles. They are a secondary source to the CP3-Port-Toas. *The Scout Mite. These hunt the CP3s. *The Chameleon Spy. Portable Toaster being red, there is a natural hate between the two. *Fyromen. They hate each other with the most hate that could possibly exist in the universe. The Myth of the Toaster Launcher.v2.1 ''Now this, is a nice weapon. -Portable Toaster upon recieving the Toaster Launcher. There is a legend that if in '''extreme danger', Portable Toaster will aquire a rocket launcher that launches energy pellets and does extreme damage. Research is required to have a full understanding, but the launcher seems to be permanent on another server, a gift from Peanuts who is an admin on said server. It is Portable's most prized possesion, but it wont help win the war, which is why Portable is looking for the upgraded version of the Toaster Launcher, lost long ago in the biggest tornado ever to exist. It wont nce Portable finds it, the Fyromen will either give up, or be slain. Hopefully it is not too late. Extra: What happened in the Toastericaonate. It was a sunny day in ctf_2fort, and Portable Toaster was doing his annual march to help raise awareness for bread tumor cancer. *a truck pulls up* A CP3-Port-Toas: Hey guys, look, someones here. Another CP3-Port-Toas: I thought people knew that 2fort was off limits today. *truck door opens and a medic and a heavy step out.* Heavy: Open fire. *Mercs jump out and start firing on the CP3s.* Portable notices this, and starts hiding in a nearby barrel. A CP3-Port-Toas: GOD PLEASE HELP! *The CP3-Port-Toas' head dissapears in a mist of blood.* -around 5 minutes pass.- Portable has been praying to his gods. *a man approaches the barrel he is hiding in and opens it.* Portable Toaster: Please, dont kill me. ???: Dont worry, I am a peanut. *guy who thinks hes a peanut gives Portable a Cow Mangler and leaves.* Portable Toaster: Well, now or never. *Portable fires it, and it shoots 53 pellets at once, killing 6 mercs* Portable Toaster: Okay, what the ****. CP3-Port-Toas who is nearly dead: Please, go, make sure they all pay. *after another 5 minutes of Portable killing the mercs, they give up and leave.* Portable Toaster: YOU BIGHEAD WANKERS! An advanced CP3: Portable, we have sustained massive casualties. The attack was lead by two men, names Frok and Holty. Portable Toaster: Tend the wounded. I have some men to hunt. Category:Endangered Species